Confirmation completes the grace of Baptism. In it the baptized are sealed with the gift of the Holy Spirit, bound more perfectly to the Church, enriched with the Spirit's special strength, and, as the Catechism says, more strictly obliged to spread and defend the faith by word and deed as true witnesses of Christ (1285, 1303). Like Baptism it imprints a permanent character and can be received only once. This guide is for a candidate, or the parent of one, going through parish preparation in the United States, where the sacrament is normally conferred by the bishop on the baptized who have reached the age of discretion, at an age set by each diocese.

What you need

• Your baptismal certificate (request a recent copy from the parish of your Baptism)
• Enrollment in your parish's Confirmation preparation, usually a year or more of catechesis
• A sponsor who meets the Church's requirements, and his or her sponsor certificate
• A recent Confession, so that you receive the sacrament in a state of grace
• The renewal of baptismal promises read over beforehand

When to pray it

Throughout the preparation period, and especially in the days before the celebration. Many candidates pray a novena to the Holy Spirit in the nine days before Confirmation, using Veni Creator Spiritus or the Prayer to the Holy Spirit.

Steps

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   Step 1: Understand what Confirmation is

   At Pentecost the Holy Spirit came upon the Apostles, and from the beginning the Apostles handed on that gift to the newly baptized by the laying on of hands. Confirmation is that gift, given to you. Its effects, the Catechism teaches (1303), are a deeper rooting in divine sonship, a firmer union with Christ, an increase of the gifts of the Holy Spirit, a more perfect bond with the Church, and a special strength to spread and defend the faith. It is received once, it is normally conferred by the bishop, and in the Latin Church it is ordinarily received after Baptism and at the age of discretion, the exact age being set by each conference of bishops and diocese.

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   Step 2: Learn the gifts of the Holy Spirit

   The seven gifts of the Holy Spirit are wisdom, understanding, counsel, fortitude, knowledge, piety and fear of the Lord (Catechism 1831); they belong in their fullness to Christ and are given to sustain the moral life of every Christian. Learn them by name and ask for them by name in prayer, one each day for a week. The traditional way to do this is to pray Veni Creator Spiritus▾ or the Prayer to the Holy Spirit ('Come, Holy Spirit▾, fill the hearts of your faithful...') daily during your preparation, and to ask the Spirit for whichever gift you most need.

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   Step 3: Take part in preparation, and in service if your parish asks

   Canon 889 §2 asks that a candidate be suitably instructed, properly disposed and able to renew the baptismal promises; canon 890 makes parents and pastors responsible for seeing that the faithful are prepared. Parishes do this through classes, retreats, and often a period of service to the parish or the poor. Take these seriously as preparation, not as hurdles: the classes teach what you are receiving, the retreat gives you time to pray, and the service is a first taste of the mission the sacrament sends you on. Service hours are a parish custom rather than a requirement of the Church, but a good one.

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   Step 4: Choose a sponsor

   A sponsor presents you to the bishop and, canon 892 says, takes care that you behave as a true witness of Christ and fulfill the obligations of the sacrament. The requirements are the same as for a godparent (canon 893): the sponsor must be chosen by the parents (or by the one to be baptized) and have the aptitude and intention for the role; be at least sixteen years old, unless the diocesan bishop has set another age or the pastor or minister judges a just exception should be made; be a Catholic who has been confirmed and has received Holy Communion, and who leads a life in harmony with the faith and with the role being undertaken; not be under any canonical penalty; and not be the father or mother of the one to be baptized. The Church says it is desirable that one of your baptismal godparents be your sponsor, to show the unity of the two sacraments. Ask early, and ask the sponsor to get a certificate from his or her parish. See the guide on choosing a Confirmation saint and sponsor.

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   Step 5: Choose a Confirmation name

   In many places it is the custom for a candidate to take the name of a saint at Confirmation, chosen as a patron and model; the bishop uses it when he anoints you. This is a custom, not a requirement of the rite, and you may simply keep your baptismal name, especially if it is already a saint's name. If you choose a new name, choose it for the saint, not for the sound: read the saint's life, learn why he or she is honored, and ask that saint's prayers during your preparation. Tell the parish the name in good time so the certificate can be prepared.

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   Step 6: Go to Confession beforehand

   To receive Confirmation one must be in a state of grace, and the Catechism (1310) says one should receive the Sacrament of Penance in order to be cleansed for the gift of the Holy Spirit. Most parishes schedule a Confession service or extra times in the week before the celebration. Prepare with an examination of conscience, confess honestly, and pray the Act of Contrition▾. Go even if you have no serious sin to confess; the grace of the sacrament prepares the soul, and it is good to come to the bishop with a clear conscience.

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   Step 7: The rite: promises, laying on of hands, chrism

   Confirmation is usually celebrated within Mass, after the Gospel and homily. The candidates are presented, and the bishop asks you to renew the promises of your Baptism: to each question, 'Do you renounce Satan...? Do you believe in God, the Father almighty...?' you answer, 'I do.' The bishop and the priests with him then extend their hands over all the candidates while the bishop prays that the Father will send the Holy Spirit with his gifts. Then each candidate comes forward with the sponsor's right hand on his or her shoulder. The bishop dips his thumb in chrism and traces the cross on your forehead, saying, 'N., be sealed with the Gift of the Holy Spirit.' You answer, 'Amen.' He says, 'Peace be with you,' and you answer, 'And with your spirit.' Mass continues with the Prayer of the Faithful and the Eucharist.

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   Step 8: Live confirmed

   The sacrament is not the end of anything. You are now, in the Church's words, more strictly obliged to spread and defend the faith by word and deed. Concretely: keep Sunday Mass without exception, go to Confession regularly, pray every day (the Morning Offering▾ is a good daily habit to begin), and find one way to serve, in the parish or beyond. Keep in touch with your sponsor and ask your Confirmation saint's prayers by name. Pray the Prayer to the Holy Spirit often, asking for the gifts you were given to grow. The Holy Spirit does not leave; the question is whether you will keep listening.

Tips

• Confirmation is not a graduation from religious education, and the Church does not treat it as a rite of passage into adulthood; it is the completion of your Baptism and a sending on mission.
• Baptized Catholics who were never confirmed can receive the sacrament at any age; ask the parish about adult preparation, often in a few sessions in the weeks before Pentecost or the Easter Vigil.
• Attend Mass every Sunday during preparation. The best preparation is a habit of prayer and the sacraments, not the completion of a checklist.
• If your diocese confirms at a young age or restores the original order (Confirmation before First Communion), the preparation will look different; the sacrament is the same.